Equilibrium

Historically I have surrounded myself by girl-friends. of course I have had guy friends, EXCELLENT guy friends, great quality, but not that much quantity. Girlfriends well... great quantity and fortunately great quality as well. So there's always this feminine vibe around, which I love, because I really like being a female, I love being a feminine female.

And then something happened. There's this... situation.

The situation is kinda messing me up. I could say it moved the ground under my feet, but it feels more like it took the ground under my feet away. I can remember only one time before when I felt devastated. But that situation is not what I want to write about today, but the things and behaviours around this situation.

The only people I had talked about this situationi till today were guys. Different guys, with different attachments to my life, and at different geographical distance from me. That seemed curious to me, it does till today. And what I thought was... I am looking for the YANG to give a little equilibrium to my YIN?

Iconographically "feminine" is represented as a goblet, while "masculine" is represented as a sword. Which made me think: why am I looking for the sword instead of the globlet? Why something that can cut, instead of something that can contain? Maybe I was looking for a masculine point of view so that the sword could cut my many thoughts, the many clouds around this situation. The more I talk to men the more pragmatic I find them, and I must admit I like that, especially when I feel like such a non-pragmatic person. Maybe I was looking for the sword because it's a symbol of strength, it is something a warrior carries around. It is something one can use to fight the enemy or to defend from it.

And today a woman approaoched me. Not just a woman, a woman with a strong YANG, and surprisingly enough, a strong sensitivity as well. I talked to her, and I could find pragmatism in her. More YANG than YIN (which is not really surprising, I've been thinking for a while she is more connected to her masculine side than other girls). It was not that different from talking to the guys.

And then the YIN came. Very feminine, very containing and comforting. As if in equilibrium to all the YANG I had been getting from the guys, as if a reinforcement to my own YIN, that seemed to be disolving into nothingness, unable to contain myself. There weren't really many question, just a request to allow myself to be contained, by them, by my friends, by "the girls". No analysis, no information... pure feminine emotion, to match my own YIN, outnumbered by so much YANG.

I have always felt like a strong feminine female, with a lot of YIN going on. I just hadn't realized till today that a part of that YIN comes from my friends.

And today it all looks better. Lots of energy. Lots of YANG from the guys, who have been great, very supportive, helping me connect with my own YANG. Lots of YIN also, from the girls, very containing, giving extra strength to my worn out YIN.

How could I make it without them? Guys and girls? Men and women? And I am so grateful that God/dess created us in this way, to image and likeness, man and women s/he created us.

Now... I think this sounds very... stereotypical. I think both, men and women, guys and girls, have YIN and YANG. I just wonder... is it possible that in situations such as these, we polarize to one of these energies as a way to remind us that we don't HAVE to go trhough this alone, and that we need at least one more person who can bring us back to equilibrium? It doesn't necessarily have to be one from the opposite sex or gender, it just has to be one with a different energy. And maybe, just maybe, the others will polarize also, to try and balance our own polarization.

PD: Image taken from here